


The Paths of Joyful Stars

by 1nkmistress_1ra



Category: Spellslinger - Sebastien de Castell
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-23
Updated: 2021-01-27
Packaged: 2021-03-15 02:00:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,190
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28930638
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/1nkmistress_1ra/pseuds/1nkmistress_1ra
Summary: SPOILERS FOR SOULBINDER AND BEYOND.A set of short fics in a universe that Butelios and Kellen are together, either as Travelling partners, a couple, friends with benefits, or what have you.
Relationships: Kellen/Butelios
Comments: 5
Kudos: 4





	1. Breaking the Mold

SUMMARY  
Kellen gets drunk and his thoughts on his self-worth come to light. 

STORY  
Butelios thought it best to take him by the hand, rather than carry him, considering people were staring. He knew these parts of Darome better than Kellen was, and the people were significantly less accepting than those in the Abbey.

Kellen slammed face-first into the wall next to the threshold and Butelios lead him with both hands. “On the bed. We leave in the morning. I have a feeling we’re not as welcome here as I thought.”

“I… used to be the Queen’s Tutor of Cards here…” Kellen revealed. It was the first thing he’d said since the match between him and the bartender. This surprised Butelios in two ways: that Kellen ever got somewhere with his card tricks, and that he had been in Darome

“You were her tutor?”

“It was to get out of…” Kellen paused and hiccuped, teetering to one side before he righted himself back up, “… of being Executed.”

There it was. Butelios couldn’t help it, but the thought slipped into his mind faster than he imagined. He didn’t like to think about Kellen’s reckless behavior, especially since it got them into trouble that night. 

The bartender refused to serve Kellen a beer, saying that he didn’t serve Cowards. Except, his exact wording was that “he didn’t serve [Kellen’s] kind.” 

Kellen flew off the handle faster than Butelios or even Reichis could react. That was when the Bartender tried to correct himself, but it was too late. A knife was at his throat and it bit deep enough the bartender needed a doctor. 

He survived, to Kellen’s chagrin and relief, and neither Argosi could think it would be possible to feel both emotions. And that was before Kellen proceeded to drink like a fish when another bartender took place. But, now, he felt ill. He didn’t know if his drink was spiked, or if he was lighter weight than he liked to dream himself to be. 

Butelios steadied Kellen to lay back into the nice bed, but Kellen was as stubborn as ever and ended up on his side, instead. 

“The Bastard is gonna slit our throats when he gets the chance,” Kellen slurred his words and tried to get back up, but Butelios wouldn’t let him. It didn’t take much effort, but Kellen gave up after Butelios pressed him against the mattress. 

“You’re drunk. Besides, he’ll just kick us out if we cause more trouble.” Butelios pointed out. 

“Hmm… You didn’t see the knife, did you? It wasn’t mine, by the way… ” 

Butelio’s heart rate spiked when Kellen went on about the foot-long scabbard at the man’s belt, and how Kellen pickpocketed and almost dirtied the blade. He lost it somewhere in the commotion to get a doctor. 

“Don’t try that again,” Butelios felt like he could go on, but decided to push the topic of recklessly endangering others over presumed prejudices when Kellen was sober. 

“You know, you scare me sometimes, you know that?” he said. 

Butelios didn’t know what kind of face he pulled when he said that, but Kellen looked away, all manner of wrath skidding to an end. 

“I seem to do that a lot lately,” his voice was soft and guilt-ridden. 

It was an instinct in Butelios to comfort, but he felt that a drunk Kellen would be harder to sway than a sober one. “A Drunk man’s words were a sober man’s thoughts,” his mentor once said. 

“I’ll be back in a few,” he adjusted himself up and down to seem presentable, as if the fight never happened, “Stay here, I’ll try to negotiate with the bar owners to get a breakfast.”

Kellen’s only response was to roll over onto his stomach and moan out his last request for the night, “Be sure to succeed.”

* * *

The conversation went as it expected. The bartenders, the manager, and a few witnesses had half a mind to hangs up on the large Argosi, but Butelios forked over enough money to foot the damages of the bar and parts of the medical bill. He handed over a small jar of a green salve before leaving. 

No one pursued him as he made it back to the room, so he took it as a good sign. 

When he came back to the room, Kellen was still in the position and his face was in his hands. 

The mistake of letting the door close behind him without checking for the noise made Kellen flinch and look behind him. 

Butelios thought it another thing to just happen and sat next to him. 

Kellen wiped his eyes and faced away. 

“Butelios, do you see value in every life?”

“In Every life? I won’t lie, and say ‘every individual’… Somethings aren’t forgivable...”

“Ohh. What about mine?” When Kellen turned to him, he could tell that Kellen cried for a small bout. Reichis was nowhere to be found, but something else told Butelios that Reichis doesn’t see it as much anymore. 

Butelios furrowed his brow at the question, “You’re not the worst of it, I promise you.”

“Oh…” For a second, Kellen looked relieved. 

“If you don’t mind me asking, why bring this up?” Butelios asked. 

“My father didn’t. See the worth in me, I mean, and look where that’s gotten me.” 

As if Butelios’s heart couldn’t bleed enough for the boy. “Your father was a cruel man, Kellen, and he doesn’t deserve the thought.”

“I know. It’s just… it’s not easy. Growing up physically, it’s a developmental stage of the mental state. I don’t… I don’t know how to say it. I always felt like shit compared to everyone else, you know?”

“You know, I haven’t seen this side of you.”

“The what?”

“The specifics of your Jan’Tep side. Aside for what happened to your sister… ”

“Ohh… Oh no… ”

“Would you like to sober up completely before you tell what happens?”

Kellen’s silence brought the ambient noise of the room forth, even as he shifted into a fetal position. 

Butelios sighed, knowing this could be the last time Kellen would ever talk about it. 

“I remember, I had to take the trials to become a mage… Several of my classmates passed. I never even took it.”

Butelios could only listen as the last chance to know Kellen intimately revealed much about him. 

“I bitch and moan about it often, to be honest.”

“I knew I took you for such a High class. Son of the Mage Sovereign.” Butelios mused on the title, pondering the Spell-Warrant, and the countless times Kellen’s had to face death similarly to the Shadowcasters.

“It's not your fault that you had to go through that, you know.”

“Is it though?” Kellen’s voice broke into a whisper, midsentence. 

“It isn’t,” Butelios tried to assure him. 

“Oh…” Kellen didn’t trust another word out of his mouth or else he’d end up sobbing. 

“Gods, I feel so… so childish.”

“It’s been a while since you’ve aired this, hasn’t it.”

“Reichis won’t hear it. Not that I blame him. My kind did wipe out his species… ”

“I’m aware.”

“What if I end up like them in the end? I— I don’t want to be cruel… Evil. Like… ”

“Therein lies the difference. Evil doesn’t think of itself evil no matter what it does.”

“Hmm?”

“Kellen, have you ever done something out of malice?”

“Where are you going with this?”

“I’m saying that intention and impact are both things to be taken accounted for. Remember the Ebony Abbey? When you gave its location? You were tricked, hoping to save your friend…There was no Malice behind that and We the Shadowcasters understood that.”

“But I doomed your home.”

Butelios didn’t deny that part, but he didn’t reiterate it, either. 

He wrapped his arms around Kellen and pulled him close. 

“But, it’s in the past now… We went our separate ways and continued to live. It may have been quite the setback, but we’re a durable kind. You’ve already paid the penance for it and a year has passed since. We moved on.” 

Kellen pulled Butelios’s hands up to his mouth and kissed them. “Moved on… ”

“Is moving on a hard thing for the Jan’Tep to do?”

“I suppose the hypocrisy of the Jan’Tep come up when it comes to moving on.” The atrocities the Jan’tep Committed over the decades came to mind and it burned its way into Kellen’s conscious 

“Well, consider this a time you’ve broken the mold.”


	2. All of Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes, Kellen needs a reminder that love isn't a transaction.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A Continuation of the previous work. More tooth-rotting fluff ahead.

Additional note: PLEASE for the sake of your Ancestors, listen to All of Me by John Legend as you read (Original or instrumental, either works.)

STORY  
Now that Kellen was sober, but with a hangover, Butelios couldn’t believe that he could be more belligerent, after the confession.

Butelios also mentioned it was Kellen’s call on when to leave. 

So, They packed up immediately, grabbed their horses, and left early in the morning before anyone else woke up. It was better that way. As much as Kellen was concerned, they overstayed their welcome. Besides, it was going to be a long trip, anyway. 

Heading back down to Gitabria would prove the time either a hopeless cause or a worthy trip. 

The nights in the Desert were rough, as Kellen learned in the years he traveled, but he was surprised Butelios wasn’t as well adjusted. How long has Butelios lived at the Ebony Abbey? Hell, how well-versed in Desert life was he, if at all?

Butelios ditched the tarps and strolled to the fire and traveling packs. 

“I’m sorry you had to see me like that back there,” Kellen said when he was close enough. There was no one else around but a red tint spread itself across his face. The sign of shame. 

“His wording wasn’t exactly subtle.” Butelios reminded him. 

Kellen huffed and started to set up the campsite.“Yeah… ”

“I don’t mean to pry too far. You don’t often go the way of Thunder… but back there, you almost killed him.”

Kellen pursed his lips, looking away. 

“Was it personal?”

“I think I can best describe it as… a recent discovery.”

“Oh?”

“After a little one night stand with the Path of Mountain Storms, I found that there wasn’t any harm in it, after all,” Kellen flushed at his perpetual Jan’Tep habit of overexplaining, “It wasn’t expected but, detours happen, and sometimes they’re fun, I guess.”

Butelios grinned as Kellen flicked another pinch of red powder onto the wood as the sun went down. “Is there a specific time when you felt an attraction to another man?”

Kellen looked up at the stars as if for an answer. “Before Stormy?”

“Yes.”

“I met you.”

That gave Butelios pause. “Really?”

Kellen sighed, bringing himself to be serious, “No… it wasn’t until you came back as if from the dead and saved those people that I was sure I felt something for you.”

“Oh…”

“And then we parted ways.” 

“I see…”

Kelen then heaved a deep breath then let it out before he came out with the next part. He knew it would hurt Butelios, but he couldn’t help but admit it. He hated himself already, even more so than usual. “Do you remember when I was drunk after we killed Tas’Diem and freed those people? And you asked about my preference, and I said I preferred girls?”

“Yes.”

“I know now that it was indoctrinated in me thanks to Jan’Tep tradition, but I was scared when you asked those questions.”

Butelios’s looked fearful at the admittance. His heart weighed heavy that Kellen thought that of him as he brought him to the safety of a warm bed. 

“But I know that you didn’t mean it like that,” Kellen went on. 

“You were in Denial?”

“That’s the best word to describe it. Is that normal?”

“It’s perfectly fine. It happens quite often, actually.”

“Heh, yet another way to disappoint my father, if he was alive.” 

Butelios let out a laugh, which Kellen couldn’t help but smile at. It was a gentle, genuine sound, something Kellen could get used to, since the only laughter he’d heard before was at his expense. 

“I have to ask, what path has the Path of Endless Stars been taking lately?”

“One that would prefer the company of a good man, I know that.”

“I see… ”

Butelios wrapped his arms around him, and Kellen leaned into the warmth. It was a warmth that resonated with him for the first time in a long while. He couldn’t remember the last time he was held, though it may be that very factor that was messing with his head. 

The sigh was audible, and Butelios didn’t mind it. 

“How long has it been, since the Ebony Abbey?” Kellen asked. 

“A year at the least.”

“Hmm… A year since I first saw you…”

“A year since we first met, indeed.”

“… I shouldn’t have thrown you over the cliff to get at Tournam…”

Butelios sighed, whether out of exasperation or of humor, Kellen will never find out. “At least it’s kind of a fun story, now.”

Kellen let out a soft, mirthless laugh. “Yeah… ” his face slacked back to a guilty look. 

There was a silence, save for the night critters. Crickets, creeping lizards, and snakes galore. But Butelios concurred a sort of barrier around the tent. The black tears under his eyes seemed to shift in the dying firelight. Which reminded Kellen… 

As he fed the fire with another log and a pinch of powder, Butelios said, “I heard you were about to board a boat to Tristia. Is that true?”

“Yes, It’s true… I almost followed Nephenia to Tristia. And that was based on speculation that she was going there.” He sat back down across from him and pulled his dagger and his honing stone. The gliding scrape of metal on stone echoed through the night. 

“You know that those big decisions like that shouldn’t be decided based on someone else.”

“I do. But, I’m glad I stayed. I wouldn’t have been able to find you again.”

“You stayed for me?”

“What? No… Wait. I mean… I… I stayed because I thought going to Tristia would be risky… No money, I don’t know the language and whatnot. And I mean… decent company’s always good.”

“I concur. But I can’t help but wonder, how dedicated were you to Nephenia you’d go to another country to go after her?”

Kellen sighed. “You know, all my childhood I honestly thought I wouldn’t find true love outside of Nephenia, I still don’t know if it was a simple crush or not. I’m still tempted to say she only put up with me because I was pitiful enough… ”

“How do you feel about her, now?”

Kellen paused, reeling. He loved Nephenia to the core, But lately, it waned from infatuation to friendship. He was aware love came in all sorts of forms, familial, intimate, friendship, and much more. He didn’t know why the question hit him harder than he expected. Maybe it was because he didn’t know how he felt. He sheathed the dagger and set the honing stone back in his pack. 

“I don’t know,” he admitted. 

“What made you fall involve in the first place? If you don’t mind me asking.”

Kellen let another pause slid by as he thought about his first encounter. Then he blushed. He didn’t think he could be humiliated by such an old memory, but it was when he was no older than 8. He met Nephenia after getting beaten by Tennat. Nephenia stepped in and let them have it. 

They got along after Tennat thought “it wasn’t worth the effort” and left them be. 

“She shouted at Tennat for using an iron spell on me when we were kids.”

“She showed you kindness.”

“Yeah… she did.”

“Is that what drew you into me?”

“I suppose. Then again, it’s a rather selfish thing to want from people. I know people don’t owe me kindness, but it’s nice to receive it in return every once in a while.”

Butelios understood the notion, and he also understood that Kellen may not have been this intimate with anyone aside from the Shadowcasters. Getting Shadowblack was a Death Warrant, but the citizens of the Ebony Abbey turned it into some sort of blessing in disguise. 

A question popped into Butelios’s mind, but he cared not to ask it. He wondered if Kellen could be a kind man. Maybe not conventionally, to do the dangerous favors the world needed. He thought about the story of the God, how Kellen took the time to play Shujan and give the poor boy one last chance to live a boy’s life before… 

Butelios shook the saddening events. “You showed kindness to a God once.”

“I only gave him a few rounds of Shujan—”

“You also gave him a name, and saved him from Arcanists and freed him from a tower.”

“That’s different. He wasn’t…” Kellen couldn’t bring himself to call the god human, and yet it seemed cruel to do so. He was just a boy injected with Shadowblack and the only difference that laid between him and the God was that Kellen was reviled. And yet Kellen couldn’t be jealous. “He wasn’t human,” he finalized. 

“You mentioned once he was young, yes?”

“Can we not talk about the God?”

“Fair enough… Though I can’t help but wonder… have you ever spoken about your Shadowblack to anyone else, like this?”

“I’m a frequent complainer, I’ll whine about it to everyone.”

“I mean to someone who can deeply relate to you and has it, Diadera, Azir, Tournam, Ghilla, Suta’rei?”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“Because, it’s not like anyone cares. I just convinced myself that people go through similar events. At least it gave them a better reason not to care, to me at least.”

“Kellen, not everyone has Survived a Death Warrant and Continued to do favors for the world like you, like us.”

“So?”

“Have you thought that squaring up against Ke’Heops may have done the world a huge favor?”

Kellen’s face turned to a scowl, but Butelios could tell it wasn’t aimed at him. “Ke’Heops was my father. What kind of traitorous Fuck would kill—”

But, Butelios cut him off, “Your father would have been a tyrant if he succeeded with his plans.”

That made Kellen stiffen in Butelios’s warm hold. It was a rude thing to interrupt, which caught Kellen by surprise, and it only doubled thanks to his words. Butelios could tell the topic was an inner struggle that hit harder than the Shadowblack itself: The ultimate question was a matter of if Killing Ke’Heops was worth it. 

Whether Kellen meant it or not, his answer came to light, and it was evident that it was a deeply unwanted truth. “Yeah… he would’ve been…”

“I can see why you feel guilty.”

“It was still a dirty trick…”

Butelios strolled around the fire and placed himself behind Kellen, and pulled him back against him. 

“You’re oddly… showy in your affections.” Kellen couldn’t find the word, not that he didn’t mind the display of affection. He was more worried if someone else didn’t like it. 

“I used to be like this with Tournam.”

“And he liked it?”

“Only in private. You know him… he always trying to talk himself up as a tough man”

Kellen smiled, momentarily, then he remembered Tournam’s true colors. He would have been such a great friend if he wasn’t so much like Tennat. 

“Do you miss Tournam?” he asked. 

“I do… But I remember he pushed me over the edge of a cliff. I’m sure he’s doing well, wherever he is… ”

“I see… ”

Another silence passed. Butelios stared up at the inverted sky and understood why Kellen picked his name. The Path of Endless Stars certainly made sense, in both a logical sense and the Argosi Sense. 

He recalled that Kellen picked it because he was always following a path, and the stars represented it best. “You said you were walking a path that preferred a good man, right?”

“Are you volunteering?” the question came out sarcastic, probably because it was. 

“Yes.”

The answer took him aback that Kellen gave pause, struggling to register the concept that someone was asking to be with him since he traveled around the territories. Sure Butelios and he were on good terms, but he didn’t expect it to be such a deeper matter. 

“You know, there is a tradition akin to wedding vows that some Argosi do to signify a union in Travelling together,” Butelios added. 

“Huh… I didn’t know. Granted, the only married Argosi I know are the Path of the Rambling Thistles.”

“Oh… Well, depending on the situation it can either be a rehearsed vow like a traditional wedding, or it can be improvised.”

“Ain’t that how it goes,” Kellen mimicked Ferius’s signature drawl. 

“But it can be binding in some cases.”

“That’s fair.”

“Do you want to make it binding?”

“I’m more curious about the custom, actually.”

“I can give an example.”

“Alright, go ahead.”

It was much like a former Daroman to give their voice like a poet. 

“Love comes in several forms and I remember the first time I felt the deep love of a lover when we came together, truly and deeply. For there is no other love than one where it a choice to love. There is no Love like when it is your own and free and reciprocated in kind. There is no love like I feel when with every date, with every comfort, with every time I spent with you. I will give you a Love that no God can give and tenfold.” 

It was a sentiment Kellen pretended was aimed at him personally. Having remembered it was a mere practice speech, he sobered up rather quickly. He, not so discreetly, wiped at his eyes with his sleeve. 

“Now, you try,” Butelios said. 

“I don’t know if I can match that.” 

“Give it a try.”

But he couldn’t think of anything to say. He didn’t know what he could use to say. He wasn’t used to a regular conversation, much less a well-thought wedding vow. He didn’t think he’d even live to be that old, or happy. His gut told him to make it count, and his anxiety grew exponentially with each passing second of thought. 

He thought about his history, his life so far with Butelios, his friendships, and his family. Family... Love… connection… loyalty… Kellen couldn’t stop thinking of the words. Then inspiration struck and it used both fists. He began. 

“The only true virtue I can see in a Jan’Tep is their loyalty, blood or by brethren. I had it drilled into me from the start, that family is all you have. And then, I found that promise was a smokescreen coming from them. I don’t know how I still trusted the House of Ke after that. I trusted Sha’maat to rescue Reichis, and she still turned our father.” 

Kellen’s throat began to close in, tightening his voice. Tears welled quite swiftly, his head started to ache.

“I like to think we severed ties with each other when I parted for the boat for Tristia after the Trick, at least that was mutual. After that, it was just me and Reichis again, like when I left Ferius and Nephania for their sakes… I still feel guilt over that… And then we met again and we traversed the country of Eldrasia time and again.”

Kellen glanced at Reichis, waiting for a snide remark. When he saw the companion was sound asleep, he continued… 

“We stuck it out together this long, and now I can’t help but think I owe you something. Like… I don’t know… My Family essentially taught me that Kindess was a transaction, a bargain, a tactic to hedge your bets. But, now, I can’t help but feel that, between us, it’s different. That you won’t betray me… That you won’t abandon me like I’m nothing more than a Pawn when I’m useless.”

Kellen looked up at Butelios, as pale tears started falling down his cheeks. 

Butelios was smiling. 

Kellen loved that smile. He saw a man that deserved to be happy. “If there is one thing about Love and Loyalty, it’s that, where you’ll find it, it won’t leave you. I just had to learn it from the right people. Butelios, will you stay with me, and only leave until it was absolutely necessary?”

Butelios wiped at his eyes. “For better or for worse, through thick and thin, through Hell and back again, I will never Abandon you.”

And it was exactly what Kellen needed to hear. He shifted himself to lay on Butelios’s chest and wrap his arms around him. 

Butelios then mocked an officiant's voice, “I now pronounce you… The Path of Joyful Stars.”

For the first time in his life, Kellen felt like he was truly loved, and he knew it was genuine. And he swore by his Ancestors, to all Seven Hells, to the Grey Passage, to the very Ends of the Earth, that he won’t lose it. Not if he could help it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WOO HOO You got this far!

**Author's Note:**

> Do what you will. I started writing these as a Comfort metaphor for my life.


End file.
